To exhale

Caspar David Friedrich's Wander Above the Sea of Fog 

I feel like I can finally stop holding my breath for the first time in 5 weeks.  Or maybe the first time in 9 months.  Whichever.

This evening I got a note from my oncologist with results of my latest tumor marker test and my tumor markers are actually down.  From 157 to 127 in  the past 5 weeks, just like that.

Finally another drug that's started out by working, thank God.

It's been a while. 

Except for a 1-time dip in June, I'm pretty sure this is the first time the tumor markers have been meaningfully down since July of 2014.  Even for most of my time on Faslodex, they were mainly holding steady.  And then, as regular readers will know, 2015 was a year of multiple failed drugs, ever increasing tumor markers, and scan after scan showing things going in the wrong direction.

It's a great relief to have some good news for a change.

I promise I really do understand that the expectation is still for the cancer to work it's way around Xeloda sooner or later, at which point we'll move on.  But at least Xeloda isn't another total failure (yes, Ibrance and Letrozole, Afinitor and Aromasin, I am looking at you). And even if Xeloda does punk out sooner rather than later, I figure we'll still be dealing with growth from a better point then we've recently been at.  At least that's something.  And you never know, maybe Xeloda will just keep on doing this beautiful thing for a while and exceed expectations.  It could happen just that way.

For me, for today, I will celebrate this little victory. Tomorrow will bring what tomorrow will bring whether or not I dance and cheer tonight.  And especially after 2015, where this cancer is concerned I'm glad to finally have something to cheer. 

And I can finally stop holding my breath, stop waiting and wondering whether Xeloda is going to do anything at all.

Nice start, Xeloda, thank you.